You want some blow?
Throughout my school years my friends and I use to always have an argument that Steven Seagal could kick Jean Claude Van Damme’s ass back to Brussels. It was obviously conversation of the highest calibre with intelligent and valid points. All of which proving that indeed if they meet in the heat of battle, Seagal’s superior Aikido skill would dominate Jean-Claude Camille François Van Varenberg aka Jean-Claude Van Damme’s flimsy karate and kick boxing skills.
Sure, Seagal may run like a 12 year old girl who has just spilt yogurt on her pink skirt and is running home to have mummy clean it off. BUT, and there is a huge butt (that’s not a spelling mistake he does have a massive ass). This man can truly act. Well actually, when I say “truly act” I really mean; stand in front of a camera with a sweet look pony tail, hold a steely gaze and deliver one liners like “The whole god dam platform’s a tiiiiimmmmmeee bomb”.
With this natural ability to act, has also come the ability to generate block buster, after ball busting block buster action movies. The critical acclaim these movies have received over the years has even put the second best action star of all time to shame, the great ginger ninja Chuck Norris! For instance this critics quote from the Northwest Herald via Rotten Tomatoes when reviewing “On Deadly Ground” states: Just what the world needs, environmental lessons from Steven Seagal. Exactly, this man hunk of a fighting machine can do it all!
So without any further hints of sarcasm and mucho love for Seagal lets get into naming his best ever movies.
Could this pony tail panther beat Van Damme? Oh yes!
I think you just listed on disc queue on our Blockbuster movie pass account. Cheesy actions movie's are the #1 thing we rent to watch. My life spends more time making fun of the movie then watching it, but it does make them more laughable. She is a true fan, and it comes down to a fact that we both have seen every movie so many times that we know them by heart, but once every couple of years we have to load the queue up with our favorite action movies and watch them. We are definitely getting our $10.00 a month out of it. I also got her hooked on streaming movies to the computer through the movie pass as well, she says the only thing Expendables 2 looks like it is missing is Steven Seagal and I think she may be right. The nice thing is I can torture my coworkers at DISH with horrible Steven Seagal one liners for a month or so.
"You've got shit for brains private, that's gunfire!" We could go on and on with Segal one liners:)